


The Trials of Salem

by Julie_Horwitz



Category: Sabrina the Teenage Witch (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-24
Updated: 2014-03-24
Packaged: 2018-01-16 20:02:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,843
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1360000
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Julie_Horwitz/pseuds/Julie_Horwitz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Salem's past catches up with him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Trials of Salem

** Disclaimer:  **

This is a work of fanfiction. The characters and situations are from the television show "Sabrina the Teenage Witch", which is copyrighted to "Archie Comics" and "Hartbreak Films". Everything else belongs to me.  
All comments and questions are welcome and may be sent to me at: jhorwitz@hotmail.com  
Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy the story.

 

_**The Trials of Salem**_  
by  
Julie Horwitz 

  


Salem Saberhagen, world-conquering warlock turned feline witch familiar, padded his way into the kitchen. He noticed Zelda Spellman sitting at the table, furiously typing away on her laptop computer. In fact, it looked as if her typing speed had been enhanced by magic. Curious about what she was up to, Salem came over and leaped onto the table.

"So," he began casually, "what-"

"Not now, Salem," Zelda cut him off. "I need to finish putting all these grades into the computer before my first class this morning. Fix your own breakfast." Before he could say a single word, she added "And don't complain again about not having thumbs. We both know you are perfectly capable of feeding yourself." Amazingly, she had continued speedily typing without missing a beat throughout the entire conversation!

"That wasn't what I was going to say, but now that you mention it," he started, "I'll-"

"I'm so late!" Hilda Spellman, Zelda's younger sister, cried as she burst into the room, effectively cutting off Salem midsentence. "It's my day to open up the coffee house and my stupid alarm didn't go off!"

"Did you try maybe setting it before you went to bed?" Salem asked innocently.

"Don't start with me, cat," Hilda shot back. She went to stand behind her sister. "Zeldie, what should I do?"

Still typing, Zelda said "Just zap yourself over about a block away and go the rest on foot. If anyone asks, your car is in the shop and you had to walk the whole way."

"You're a genius!" Hilda cried happily. "Thanks, Sis!" She started to flick her wrist, when she paused. "Now why didn't I think of that?" She shrugged as she pointed at herself. "Oh, well!" In a flash, she had disappeared.

"I could make an extremely clever remark," Salem commented, "but since no one is paying any attention to me this morning, it would be completely wasted."

"Did you say something, Salem?" Zelda asked absently.

"Case in point," the feline said. "I think I'll go watch some television."

He got off the table and trotted out of the kitchen, leaving Zelda to finish her task.

((((()))))) 

Salem jumped up onto the couch and kneaded the cushion a bit before plopping down. He reached for the tv remote with his paw and hit the power button. 

"That's the third day in a row they've treated me like this," he grumbled as he flipped between stations. "What's a cat got to do around here to get some attention? Try to take over the world? Just a little affectionate rub or a kind word once in a while. Is that too much to ask?

"I bet if Sabrina were still here she wouldn't be too busy for me," he announced to no one in particular. "She always told me everything and listened whenever I wanted to talk." He thought for a moment. "Then again, that could just be because I was always in her room!"

Sabrina, the half-mortal niece of the Spellman sisters, had opted to move into a college dormitory for her freshman year of college. She had wanted to make a fresh start after the terrible breakup with her steady boyfriend of three years, Harvey Kinkle, and she thought moving out and being on her own was the way to go. Of course, if you counted all the time she still spent at her aunts' house, you'd never know she had left!

"Maybe I'll go pay Sabrina a visit," Salem decided. "She doesn't have class for a few hours.

"I'm sure she'll be happy to see me!"

((((()))))) 

"Oh, man," Sabrina groaned loudly. "I knew I should have studied instead of watching that Star Trek marathon with Miles! Who cares if William Shatner was covertly passing top secret codes with that halting speech of his?"

She was sitting on her bed, poring over her textbook and meticulous class notes. In less than two hours, she had a major test in her philosophy class, for which she had neglected to study. She had been trying to cram in three weeks' worth of knowledge all morning.

"You don't have to be so melodramatic about it," her roommate Roxie commented as she was preparing to leave for her first class. "It's not like it's the end of the universe as we know it."

"And, I thought you knew my aunts," Sabrina said dryly. "They'll both go nuclear if my grades start dropping." Under her breath, she added, "Literally."

"Hey, you're not the one here on a scholarship," Roxie reminded her. "You're practically a freaking genius. You're allowed to get a low grade once in a while."

Sabrina laughed. "Try telling that to my Aunt Zelda. She'd za-, uh, give you a really long lecture on the merits of being the perfect student."

"Like there really is a perfect student," Roxie said. "Right. Well, as much as I'm enjoying this little female bonding of ours, I've gotta run. Enjoy your little cramming session! Later." Roxie left the bedroom.

Sabrina groaned again and let herself flop back onto her pillow.

"Isn't she just brimming with cheer this morning?" came Salem's sarcastic voice. Sabrina turned to see the black cat enter through her window. "So, what wondrous things are happening in the land of academia today?"

"Hey, Salem," Sabrina said. "Nothing much except that I have a huge test in two hours that I really haven't studied for. So, if you don't mind...?"

"Let me guess. You want me to leave?" he said. "But I just got here."

"Salem," Sabrina repeated. "I have to study. Stay if you want, but be really quiet. Okay?"

"Fine," Salem told her. "I'll be quiet." He jumped off the window sill onto her bed. "Must be genetic," he grumbled under his breath as he laid down.

Sabrina raised her eyebrows at the muffled remark. "What's genetic?"

"That the cat is constantly ignored and unloved by all the Spellman women in Westbridge," Salem declared matter-of-factly.

Sabrina sighed loudly and put down the book she had just started to pick back up. "All right, cat. What's bothering you?"

"Finally, a little love!" Salem said happily. He stood up and moved closer to her. "It's your aunts. They've been totally ignoring me! I feel like the invisible man!"

Sabrina reached out and stroked him. "First of all, you're not a man."

"Thanks for reminding me," Salem dryly interjected.

"Second of all, there's no way they can be ignoring you. You're just way too annoying!"

"Thank you once again. You're just full of sympathy today."

"Oh, come on! How can they be totally ignoring you? You're constantly in everyone's face," Sabrina reminded him.

"That's just my point," he told her. "I'm right there in the room with them and they don't say more than two words to me unless they think I'm going to say something. And then they keep cutting me off!"

"You're lucky that's all they're cutting," Sabrina commented. "Look, Salem, I really need to get back to studying." She gave him a quick scratch behind the ears and a pat on the head. "If it makes you feel any better, I'll go talk to my aunts later and see what's up."

"Oh, thank you! Thank you!" Salem exclaimed, adding a little purr for emphasis. "I'll be forever grateful!"

"Yeah, yeah," Sabrina waved him off. "Now are you going to be quiet?" 

"Nah, I think I'll go and find something to eat," he told her.

"Here, let me give you a head start," Sabrina replied with a grin and pointed a finger. "See you later!"

Salem lifted off the bed and went hurtling towards the open window. 

"Sabri-i-i-n-n-a-a-a!" he shouted as he flew out the window. 

"That takes care of that," she said. "Now, about that test..."

((((()))))) 

The gust of magic gently deposited Salem on the ground outside of Sabrina's dorm. He stood up and stretched.

"Well, at least she's paying attention to me," he commented. "Maybe her little talk with the aunties will actually work." He started to trot towards the Spellman house when something finally dawned on him.

"Wait a minute! What am I saying?!" he exclaimed, stopping in his tracks. "This is _Sabrina_ I'm talking about. Miss-I'm-More-Important-Than-Everyone-Else herself! She usually does something only if she benefits from it! And getting her aunts to pay more attention to little old me won't do her a smidgen of good! 

"I'm doomed to be ignored for the rest of my kitty lives!" he wailed. He sobbed loudly. "I guess I'll just go home and wallow in my misery.

"Well, I'll start wallowing after I watch a little of that marvel they call television. I believe it's almost time for 'Jerry Springer'!"

((((()))))) 

Salem's graceless exit through the window had not gone unnoticed. Across the street, hidden in the shadows, the woman watched him.

For years she had searched for the whereabouts of Salem Saberhagen, the warlock that had ruined her life. It had taken a Herculean effort, but she had at last found him. All her years of waiting and plotting was finally going to pay off.

Salem was going to suffer.

In the middle of her musings, a man crossed her path and carelessly tossed a crumpled piece of paper onto the ground.

Suddenly, her entire body began to twitch uncontrollably.

Silently, she cursed the unfortunate side-effect that she had developed since Salem's visit to her village all those years ago. The mere sight of trash set it off. No amount of therapy had been able to rid her of this nuisance. And, make no mistake, she had had her share of therapy!

There was only one way to end the twitching. Paying no attention to the stares she was attracting, she walked over to the offending item and picked it up between her thumb and forefinger. She walked over to a trash bin and, turning away, distastefully deposited the paper.

Knowing that the trash had been safely put where it belonged, the muscle spasms immediately ceased. She took a deep breath and felt much better.

Still silent, she walked away from the scene and turned a corner into a dark alley where no prying eyes could observe her.

Oh yes, Salem was going to pay. The Witches Council had been too lenient on him and his minions. It was time to pay his dues. 

She muttered a few words and disappeared in a red flash.

((((()))))) 

A few hours later, Salem flipped off the tv. "Now that all the good shows for this time slot are over, I can indulge in my misery by stuffing my face with food. I'm sure I can find all kinds of good comfort food in the kitchen."

He made his way into the kitchen and looked around. "Where would those two hide all the good stuff? They can't possibly just zap in everything as they need it." He thought about that for a beat. "Well, maybe they can, but I've seen some pretty hefty grocery bills around this joint! Hilda has a sweet tooth that rivals my own!"

He began to scrounge around, looking in all the places he could reach with his thumbless paws and not-so-slight furry body. After several minutes of fruitless searching, he came to the conclusion that there was no "comfort foods" to be found.

"Oh, the humanity! Not only have they been ignoring me, but they've neglected to go shopping! I don't know which is worse: being unloved or starving to death! How can I wallow in my misery when I don't have anything to do the wallowing with?

"That's it! No more suffering in silence for this cat," Salem declared. "It's time I took matters into my own paws. I'll make Hilda and Zelda take notice of me! If they think they can continue to ignore me, they have another think coming!" He laughed madly. 

"Hmm, so how can I get the blondes to treat me right? Maybe if they realized how important I was to this house, they'd never ignore me again. Who else is going to do the manly-man things?"

He paced back and forth while trying to come up with the perfect scheme. Finally, a brilliant plan hit him.

"I'll pretend to be kidnapped! Once they see that someone else thinks I'm important enough to ransom, surely they'll realize how important I am to this household! And, if I get to keep the ransom money, that'll be a perfect bonus! It's so flawless, there's no way it can fail!" He thought about that for a moment.

"Well, it almost worked when I tried it on Paula Abdul!" 

((((()))))) 

"There, that's perfect!" Salem declared upon examining his hand work. The ransom note was a masterpiece. Well, it was if you ignored the several pawprints all over the paper. Hey, cutting and pasting is not easy when you are a cat! "Now, to make it look like I've been taken against my will."

He ran around the downstairs, knocking over things, tearing papers, banging against the wall. Anything to create all the signs of a titanic struggle. He was leaving nothing to chance. His plan wouldn't work unless Zelda and Hilda were totally convinced he had been kidnapped. Besides, they could clean up the place with a single point of the finger.

Satisfied that the place had been sufficiently trashed, Salem placed the note in a strategic location.

"Okay, time to get scarce for two days," he announced. "I think that's more than enough time for them to realize how empty their lives would be without me." 

He squeezed through the cat door ( _I really should consider going on a diet_ , he thought) and dashed down the driveway. He hadn't even gone a quarter of a quarter of a mile when he slowed to a calmer pace. "All right, so I really do need to go on a diet!" he panted. "Okay, first thing after they've finished pampering me with the love I so richly deserve, I'll work on getting into shape."

He slowly began to move once again when he was assaulted by one of the most divine aromas in creation.

"Tuna!" he cried out! "Must...find...source! So...good!" He found a second wind and began to run towards the smell. "I may be a 'prisoner', but it doesn't mean I have to starve!"

He rounded one last corner before spotting nirvana. There, sitting at the end of an alley, was the biggest bowl of tuna he had ever seen. In fact, the bowl even had his name written on it in bright letters. 

"Hmm, common sense would tell me that something isn't right here. But, forget common sense! There's a big bowl of tuna with my name on it, literally! I'm going for it!"

Summoning a third wind, he burst down the alley and started noisily chowing down the tasty treat.

"Got you!" a voice shouted as Salem found himself roughly grabbed and thrown into a metal cage.

"Hey-I mean, meow!" Salem protested indignantly. He looked up to see a woman standing over his prison. 

"Give it up, Saberhagen," she said. "You're not fooling anybody with that pathetic attempt at a true feline noise."

"I, for one, thought it sounded pretty realistic," Salem argued. The woman smiled smugly as he realized his mistake. "Oops!"

"I've waited years for this moment. And, now that it's finally here, it's even better than I ever imagined," she told him.

"Well, that's just great," Salem told her. "Now that it's come and gone, I don't suppose you'd mind letting me out?" She glared at him. "I guess that means no. Jeez, you can't blame a kitty for trying!"

"Oh, no. You're not going anywhere. At least, not yet. Maybe after I'm finished with you, I'll let you go," she said. "Or, I could just have you stuffed. It depends on my mood."

"Then let's just hope you're in a really good mood. Are you done with me yet?"

She laughed harshly. "I haven't even started. But, by the time I'm through, you'll wish you had never been born."

"That _really_ doesn't sound good," Salem commented.

In a bright red flash, they had disappeared.

((((()))))) 

"Sabrina honey, it's not as bad as it sounds," Zelda was saying to her niece as the three Spellmans returned home. "I'm sure you did fine. No one works harder to keep up their GPA than you do."

"Thanks, Aunt Zelda. I studied really hard, but I still feel that I didn't know it as well as I should have," Sabrina told her.

"Zelda's right," Hilda chimed it. "You probably would have done fine without studying."

"Hilda! Don't encourage her," Zelda scolded. "Sabrina is a responsible young woman who knows that studying is the most fundamental activity of a college student next to attending classes."

"And I'm sure you tell all your students that when they fail your tests," Hilda shot back.

"I never said I was an easy teacher," Zelda defended herself as she started to unlock the door. "Besides, physics is one of the most difficult subjects of all." She pushed open the door and her mouth dropped as she stepped inside. "Oh, my!"

"What...?" Sabrina started to say as she followed her. "Man, what happened here? Did someone conjure up a hurricane and forget to put it away?"

"I'm sure we all know who's responsible," Hilda said. "That cat gets into more trouble than the three of us combined."

"Salem!" Zelda called out. "Where are you? Salem?"

There was no sign of the black cat anywhere.

"That's odd. Salem can usually be found around his own messes," Zelda commented. 

"Maybe it wasn't Salem," Hilda suggested.

Sabrina noticed the piece of paper laying on the coffee table. "Hey, look what I found!" She picked it up and read it. "Oh, no! Salem!"

"What? What did he do this time?" Hilda wanted to know.

Sabrina looked up at her aunts. "He's been kidnapped!"

"What?" Zelda said. "Give me that." Sabrina dutifully handed it over to her aunt. Zelda glanced over the ransom note. "He hasn't been kidnapped. He wrote this himself."

"What?! How do you know?" Sabrina asked.

Zelda crossed her arms. "Because there are huge pawprints all over it."

"Oh, I was wondering what those were!" Sabrina exclaimed.

Hilda looked around the destroyed living room. "Are you sure? This place is pretty trashed. Is one cat really capable of doing so much damage? Oh, wait! Don't answer that!"

"But why would Salem go through so much trouble to fake his own kidnapping? What could he possibly hope to get out of this?"

A loud gasp was heard from Sabrina's location. "Um, maybe because he felt that you two were ignoring him?"

Her two aunts turned to look at her simultaneously. "Sabrina?" Zelda prompted.

"Um, it might just have possibly, slightly slipped my mind that Salem came to see me this morning and I promised I'd talk to you two for him," she told them.

"Sabrina, how could you be so irresponsible?"

"Well, I'm sorry but I had a test to cram for-" Sabrina began to defend herself. "Uh, oh."

"Sabrina, how could you?!" Zelda cried. "You told me you studied!"

"Well, I did. Sort of. It was just all this morning rather than over several days," Sabrina told her.

"Hey, time out, you two," Hilda broke in. "Don't we have something more important to worry about? Like Salem running away and faking his own kidnapping?"

"Oh, he'll be home in time for dinner. When has he ever not come home to eat?" Zelda pointed out.

"Yeah that cat has an appetite that would rival Jabba the Hutt!" Sabrina agreed. "So, what are we going to do about this mess?"

"Nothing," Zelda said. "Salem wants attention from us. He'll get it. I'll be watching him while he cleans up this house from top to bottom. Just because he feels ignored doesn't excuse him from punishment."

"Well, I guess I better be heading back to my dorm. I've got a lot of studying to do," Sabrina said, thinking this might be a good time to escape Zelda's wrath.

"You aren't going anywhere, young lady," Zelda told her firmly. "Not until you explain why you haven't been studying like you should have been."

"Um, I think I left something back at the coffee house," Hilda spoke up. "I'll just be running along," she said as she started moving towards the door.

Zelda zapped her frozen in midstep. "You're not going anywhere until you help me explain to our niece the importance of studying."

Sabrina groaned and dropped onto the couch. This was going to be a long night unless Salem got home soon...

((((()))))) 

Salem and his captor rematerialized in what appeared to be a cabin. It took Salem a minute to shake off the shock of his real kidnapping and unexpected transport.

"All right, lady! I demand to know what's going on!" Salem ordered with as much dignity as his current situation allowed him.

The woman, who had to be a witch, laughed. "You're in no position to demand anything. I'm in control here. Nothing happens unless I want it to."

"Fine. Be that way," Salem said. "I was just hoping to find out why you have this unhealthy obsession with tormenting me. It's a little disturbing."

"You really want to know? Then, I'll tell you," she said. "My name is Elara Ananke. I come from Myris."

She stopped speaking and a total silence filled the room.

"Yes?" Salem encouraged. "Go on."

"I said I come from Myris," Elara repeated.

"And I'm sure it's a very nice place," Salem told her. "So, please, tell me, why do you hate me?"

Elara practically screamed with frustration. "Myris! Myris! I said I come from Myris! Doesn't that mean anything to you?"

Salem looked at her strangely. "No. Should it?"

"Should it?! Should it?! Of course it should! The day you and your followers came to Myris was the day you ruined my life!"

"Okay, this is strangely starting to sound like an episode of a tv show," Salem commented. "I have no idea of what you are talking about. So, what did I supposedly do to ruin your life?"

"I can't believe you don't remember! You have to remember!" Elara said, beginning to pace back and forth. "If you don't remember, what good is making you suffer?"

"Well, that settles it then," Salem put in. "Since I don't remember, torturing me is pointless. You might as well let me go."

"Oh, no, that would be too easy," Elara told him, ceasing her pacing. She walked over to his cage. 

Salem backed up towards the end the farthest away from the revenge crazed witch. Elara opened the door and reached in, grabbing Salem by the scruff of his neck. She pulled him out and held him high in the air.

"I'll just have to find a way to jog your memory."

((((()))))) 

Sabrina's whole body felt as if it was in the grip of a giant cramp as she woke up. Where was she? She sat up and realized that she was not in a bed. Then she remembered. She had spent the night on her aunts' couch. She had fallen asleep waiting for Salem to come home.

When Salem had failed to show up for dinner, she and her aunts had begun to worry. It was not like Salem to miss a meal. The only time that had happened was when that bratty little boy had kidnapped him on that Christmas eve years ago. But even then, Sabrina had been able to quickly find out where he was.

She heard activity in the kitchen and decided to go check it out. She carefully avoided the debris still strewn throughout the living room. The fact that it had not been cleared up was not a good sign.

Sabrina pushed opened the kitchen door and found her aunts sitting at the table. They both looked extremely tired.

"Good morning, sweetie," Zelda said. "Did you sleep all right?"

"Yeah," Sabrina told her, zapping herself some hot coffee. "So, I take it he hasn't come home yet?"

"I'm afraid not," Zelda said wearily. "Hilda and I just spent the last three hours searching for him."

"We couldn't find any sign of him," Hilda added. "It's almost like he's disappeared from the face of Westbridge altogether."

"Which is impossible considering that he is a cat. And an overweight and pampered house cat at that," Zelda pointed out.

"So maybe he's just found a really good hiding place that you two haven't checked out yet," Sabrina reasoned. "Like my dorm, for instance." 

"That was one of the first places we checked," Zelda told her.

"Along with the coffee house," Hilda chimed in. "He's just, poof, vanished."

"Could he be in the Other Realm then?" Sabrina asked.

"I hadn't thought of that," Zelda said thoughtfully. "But he couldn't have gone there without help. He can't open the closet door on his own. And he doesn't exactly have many friends there either."

"Maybe he really _was_ kidnapped," Hilda suggested. "He doesn't have a lot of friends, but he sure has an abundance of enemies."

"Trying to take over the world isn't exactly the best way to make friends," Sabrina agreed. "I'm sure there are tons of witches who think he got off the hook too easily."

"Yeah, I think my sentence was much harsher than his," Hilda agreed. "And I didn't even do anything wrong!"

"You were on his refreshment committee, right?" Sabrina inquired of her aunt.

"Exactly! I don't see how providing a tyrant with food and drinks is any reason why I should be stuck caring for the tyrant for a century!"

"All right," Zelda broke in, "let's say he was kidnapped. Who would have done it and why would this person have waited this long to get him? Salem's been a cat for over fifty years.

"Wouldn't if have made more sense to have taken him when his takeover attempt was more, well, recent?"

((((()))))) 

"No! Please stop! I'll tell you anything! Anything!" Salem sobbed. "I just can't take it anymore!"

Elara slowly put down her spoon. The huge ice cream sundae was more than halfway eaten. She turned to look at her miserable captive. 

"Just let me have a bite! I'm starving!" he wailed. "I'll even settle for licking the spoon! Have some pity on the poor cat!"

"Then tell me you remember," Elara said firmly, picking her spoon back up.

"Okay, fine," Salem said. "I remember. I was just playing with you before. Really! Now, about giving me a bite...?"

She placed the spoon in her mouth and finished the bite of melting ice cream and hot fudge. Replacing the spoon on the table, she picked up the sundae and got out of her chair. Very slowly ( _on purpose, no doubt!_ thought Salem), she walked over to the cat's cage.

"All right," she told him. "Tell me, what happened on the day you came to Myris?" She waved the sundae enticingly in front of his cage.

"Um, well, I..." he faltered. He started to openly drool at the site of the sundae. "I admit it! I lied! I don't remember!" He sobbed wildly. "I need that sundae!"

Elara turned away from Salem and went back to the table. "Sorry. Unless you tell me what I want to hear, you don't get to eat." With that said, she began to finish the sweet dessert.

"No!" Salem cried again. "You're torturing me! I don't know how long I can last under these conditions! This is inhumane! I'll starve to death!"

"No you won't," she told him. "You could stand to lose quite a few pounds."

Salem just continued to sob.

((((()))))) 

"Sabrina? Sabrina!" Josh called to Sabrina who was staring off into space as she sat on the coffee house's couch and drank what had to be her tenth mug of coffee. 

"Huh?" Sabrina murmured as she blinked to attention. She turned to look at Josh.

"Break's over," he told her. "There are customers waiting."

She sighed. "Right. Sorry. I'll be there in a second."

"Look, if you want to take off early, it's okay. You seem a little down in the dumps today," Josh said. "Roxie and I can cover for you."

"I don't think so," Roxie chimed in as she passed by. "I'm out of here as soon as my shift's over."

"Well, then _I'll_ cover for you," he corrected himself, smiling lopsidedly. 

"No, it's all right," Sabrina assured him. "My cat ran away last night and I feel sort of responsible."

"Salem ran away? I don't believe it," Josh said, shaking his head. "He didn't seem the type. I always got the impression that he was a lazy and contented house cat. He even seemed to love it when I took photos of him."

"Yep, I'm sure he did," Sabrina half smiled. "He is the most attention-hungry individual I know." She got up from the couch.

"So, how did he get loose? And why do you feel responsible?" he asked her.

"Long story," she told him. "But my aunts and I are determined to find him."

"Sabrina," Aunt Hilda interrupted, coming over from behind the counter. "I need to speak with you. Right now."

"Okay," she said. "Josh?"

"Don't worry. I got it covered," he smiled as he went to take Sabrina's shift behind the counter. "Good luck finding Salem."

"Thanks," Hilda told him. "We're going to need it." After Josh was out of earshot, she said, "Zelda just called. She went to speak to the Witches Council about Salem's disappearance."

"Really? What did they say?"

"She didn't tell me, but she wants us both home right now," Hilda told her.

"What are we waiting for? Let's go," Sabrina said. 

"Josh," Hilda called out. "The store's yours until I get back."

"No problem," he told her.

With that taken care of, Sabrina and Hilda rushed out the door.

((((()))))) 

Sabrina and Hilda burst into the door to find Zelda waiting for them.

"Thank goodness you're here," she greeted them. "I have good news and bad news."

"So, what's the good news?" Sabrina wanted to know.

"Well, since Salem is such an important criminal, the Council decided that if he is not found in the next 24 hours, they will initiate a search for him in both Realms."

"That's great!" Sabrina said.

"But what's the bad news then?" Hilda asked.

"I think you might need to sit down for this," Zelda informed her sister.

"What? What is it?" 

"Well, I don't think this is fair, since you didn't exactly lose him, but-"

"But what?" Hilda pressed impatiently. 

"But, the Council feels that since you were appointed as his sole caretaker for the duration of his sentence, that you should be held accountable for his whereabouts at all times," Zelda said. "So, if he isn't located within one week, well..."

"Well, what? Zeldie, I need to know!"

"You'll be turned into a cat," Zelda finally finished.

"What?! A cat!" Hilda practically screeched. "Have they lost their minds? I had nothing to do with this! He ran away on his own!"

"Uh, I hate to point this out, but it technically _was_ your fault," Sabrina said. "If you two had paid more attention to him, he would never have pulled a stunt like this."

"You're not helping," Hilda told her. 

"Sorry," Sabrina said.

"There's nothing more we can do for now," Zelda calmly told her sister and her niece. "We can just hope he comes home before the Council gets involved."

"He'd better," Hilda agreed, "or I'm going to be his worst kitty nightmare!"

((((()))))) 

"I'm growing tired of this game," Elara finally said. "And I'm getting sick of eating all this food! You will admit to your crimes right now or I will make your current punishment seem like a reward."

"Can I just finish that pizza first-"

"No!"

"Sheesh! I was just asking," Salem pouted. "Lady, I'm going to tell you one last time. I have no idea of what you're talking about. I spent most of my days in my headquarters plotting what I was going to do with the world once I controlled it. I had all my followers convinced that I was a benevolent leader who just wanted to bring peace and prosperity to the world. It would have looked bad for me to do whatever it is you think I did. Which, by the way, I have no clue about as you have yet to tell me what happened."

"You are the most infuriating individual I have ever met," Elara told him.

"Why, thank you. It's a skill I pride myself on," Salem replied.

"Although, I'm loath to admit it, I'm beginning to think you're telling me the truth," she finally said after a tense few minutes of silence. "If you are, it will mean that I have wasted the last fifty years of my life seeking revenge on you."

"Well, I think you look very good for your age," Salem interjected. 

"You fool. I was a child when your followers came to my town. I never fully recovered from what they did to us. To me."

Salem seemed a bit taken aback. "I never sent my people against anyone or any place. They must have been acting on their own." He paused for a moment, preparing himself for the worst. "What exactly did they do to your town?"

"They trashed it."

"Trashed it?" Salem repeated, in shock. "As in ransacked? Destroyed?"

She shook her head. "No, worse than that. They _trashed_ it."

"You mean...?"

"Yes," Elara nodded solemnly. "They filled our beloved buildings and parks with garbage. Horrible, stinking, rotten refuse."

"I can't even imagine," Salem gasped. "Eew. Even _I_ couldn't stand that much garbage. And I'm a cat!"

"Now you know why I have devoted my entire life to finding and punishing who was responsible for this tragedy."

"I would probably do the same thing in your place," Salem told her. _Though I'd make sure I had the right person before I made a move!_ he indignantly added in his mind.

"Many of us never recovered from the incident. It took almost six months to remove all of the trash from Myris. A period of time long enough to inflict permanent damage on some. Myself included."

"Maybe I can help you find the real culprit," Salem spoke up. "I may be a cat, but I still have some connections."

Elara seemed surprised. "You'd...help me? After what I've done to you?"

"Yeah. But, under one condition."

"And what would that be?" she asked suspiciously.

"That you give me some of that food you've been tormenting me with all day. I'm in desperate need of nourishment!"

"That can be arranged," she smiled. With a point of her finger, Salem found himself transported from his cramped cage to the table covered with delicious goodies, including the unfinished pizza.

"Food!" Salem shouted with joy. He began stuffing his face immediately. Between bites, he told her, "the best person to start with would be the witch who has been my caretaker since I was turned into my furry self. Hilda Spellman. She was on my refreshment committee. She would probably know more about my followers than I do, since she had to serve them food. She's also the type who listens to other people's conversations."

"Yes, she sounds promising," Elara agreed. "Let's bring her to us." She closed her eyes and chanted a spell. "Let us solve this mystery. Bring the one I seek to me."

There was a flash of light and suddenly, Hilda, Zelda, and Sabrina appeared in the middle of the room.

"I just don't think..." Hilda was saying when she noticed that she was no longer in her living room. "Um, can someone please tell me what just happened?"

"I can," Salem spoke up as he licked pizza sauce from his paws. "Hello, ladies."

"Salem!" the three Spellmans shouted in unison.

"The one and only," he replied. "Glad to see you too."

"Wait a minute," Zelda cut in. "Salem, I want an explanation this very minute. Where have you been for the last two days and how did we get here?"

"I think I can answer for him," Elara said. "Allow me to introduce myself. I am Elara Ananke. Fifty years ago, an unforgivable act was committed upon my home and until now, I had believed Salem was responsible. 

"About a week ago, I finally found out where he was living. Yesterday morning, I took him prisoner in hopes of making him pay for what I thought he'd done. He spent the entire time telling me that he was innocent and until now I had no reason to believe him. But, after finally hearing his side of the story, I learned that I was indeed mistaken and Salem is as innocent as he claims."

"Are you sure we're talking about the same Salem?" Sabrina interjected.

She ignored the remark. "Salem has promised to help me find the true perpetrator and he indicated that one of you might be able to help me. Which one of you is Hilda Spellman?"

"Um, that's me," Hilda identified herself. "This is my sister Zelda." Zelda nodded. "And this is my niece Sabrina."

"Hi," Sabrina waved.

"How may we help you?" Zelda asked.

"Salem suggested that Hilda was privy to much of what his followers were up to," Elara stated.

"I was?" Hilda asked, confused.

"Yes, you _were_ ," Salem said loudly.

"Oh, okay," Hilda said cheerfully. "I guess I was!"

"Tell me. Who was responsible for the attack on Myris?"

Hilda's eyes bulged. "Myris? Myris?" She started to giggle. "You think _that_ was an attack? You have got to be kidding me!" She laughed uncontrollably. "Myris! An attack! What a joke!"

"Hilda!" Zelda sternly reprimanded her sister. 

"Sorry, but I can't help it," Hilda said between giggles. "It's too funny!"

Elara was furious. "Funny?! You think what was done to my home is funny?! How dare you!"

"Yeah, how dare you," Salem added for emphasis.

"Salem, be quiet," Zelda scolded him. She glared at Sabrina next.

"I didn't say anything. Honest!" Sabrina swore.

Hilda was still laughing when Zelda started to shake her roughly. "Stop that this instant! You're angering our hostess." 

She turned to Elara. "I'm sorry, but I don't know what's gotten into her. She's not usually this disrespectful."

Hilda stifled her laughter. "Okay, okay. I'm stopping now." She giggled again. "But, you're calling a stupid stunt pulled by a bunch of kids an attack."

"What are you talking about?" Elara demanded to know. "There were no children. _I_ was a child. I saw a group of adults come into the middle of town and cast a spell that caused garbage to cover everything. There is nothing funny about it. It was an unprovoked and deliberate attack against us."

"No, no, you don't seem to understand," Hilda said, her laughter fully under control. "What you saw was an illusion. A group of maybe ten kids who were part of Salem's followers were bored and decided to have a little fun while the adults were busy elsewhere. We all found out much later when they came to brag about what they had done. Everyone actually thought it was pretty funny..." At Elara's glare, she changed the direction of her narration. "Um, they cast a spell to create an imaginary army and sent it to the nearest town, which just happened to be Myris. The kids had their 'army' march into town to shake up the people by declaring an attack. Of course, their idea of an attack was to fill the place with garbage. No one was hurt and-"

"How can you say no one was hurt?" Elara demanded to know. "Do you have any idea of the emotional scarring that 'fun' caused? What damage-" She was interrupted by the loud ringing of a phone. "Excuse me. That would be my cell phone." She dug into her pocket and pulled out a phone. "Yes? All right, Karen, just calm down and tell me what happened..."

Sabrina used the distraction to go over and pick Salem up. "What were you thinking with that ransom note? My aunts knew it was a fake right away. Why didn't you wait for me?"

"Hey, based on past experience, I didn't think you'd remember what you promised," he told her. "If I was premature in my backup plan, I apologize."

"Well," Sabrina grinned, "I didn't exactly remember..."

"Ah-ha!" Salem shot back. "I was right to doubt you!"

"What can I say? Never believe anything a person cramming for a test says! I would have told you anything if it would have meant letting me study," she confessed.

"Some friend you are," Salem told her. "I thought family was more important than anything else."

"But you're not a member of my family," she teased him.

"Technically, I'm not, but think of all the family-oriented things we've done together."

"Salem, I'm kidding."

"I know," the cat told her matter-of-factly.

Meanwhile, Hilda and Zelda had an epiphany while listening to Elara's phone conversation.

"She's a shrink!" Hilda exclaimed in disbelief. "I can't believe it!"

"Why not? I think it's wonderful that she's trying to help other people," Zelda said. 

"But, she's a total nut job!" Hilda pointed out. "She's spent the last fifty years of her life wanting revenge against a cat!"

"Well, nobody's perfect," her sister pointed out. "I think it would be nice to talk with someone who knows what I'm going through."

"Yes, if what you're going through involves wanting to beat the tar out of a cat!"

Sabrina, with Salem still in her arms, rejoined her aunts. "Well, we found Salem. Can we go home yet?"

Zelda looked over to Elara who was still trying to calm down her obviously hysterical client. "I guess, but don't you think we need to finish things up here? This woman needs some help. I don't think it's right to just leave her without saying something."

"How about we leave and you stay to tie up the loose ends," Salem suggested helpfully. "You are the wisest adult here."

"Why, Salem, I had no idea you thought so highly of me," Zelda said.

"I am a feline of many secrets," he announced.

"I think he's got a point," Sabrina said. "Salem has been through enough for one day and, well, I think Aunt Hilda just plain annoys her. And someone needs to keep an eye on them at home. Especially Furface here."

"I agree with her," Hilda quickly added. "Trash girl scares me!"

"All right, if you think it's for the best."

"We do!" the three of them told her at the same time.

Zelda pointed her finger. "One, two, on the double. Send these three home before they cause any more trouble."

They disappeared, leaving Zelda to deal with Elara who was still struggling with her hysterical client.

((((()))))) 

Sabrina, being the most responsible of the three currently in the house, immediately ordered Salem to clean up his mess. After several minutes of debates such as "don't I get any reprieve for being an innocent victim", Salem finally got to work. Not trusting Hilda to be in charge, she sent her aunt upstairs to do anything.

Several hours later, Zelda returned through the linen closet. Exhausted, she collapsed into a kitchen chair.

"So, what happened after we left?" Sabrina questioned her.

"Did you kick her butt for what she did to me?" Salem called from the other room.

"No, I did no such thing," she told Salem. "I waited another half-hour for her to get off the phone. Her client had had a major panic attack and it took awhile to get her to calm down. After she was finished, we just talked for a while. It turns out she's quite a nice and interesting person."

"Yes, when she's not trying to torment you," Salem added from wherever he was.

Zelda chose to ignore him. "One of the things we discussed was that she had tried several therapists over the years and none of them had worked, which was why she remained obsessed with getting revenge. I gave her the name of a few colleagues of mine who might be able to help her work through her anger and her other, um, problem."

"You mean there's something else wrong with her besides having a few screws loose?" Hilda asked.

"That's not very nice," Zelda told her.

"Of course not! Why else would I say it?"

"So, what else happened?" Sabrina interjected before the sisters began to fight.

"After our talk, I told her that she needed to speak to the Witches Council about Salem's disappearance. She agreed and everything was straightened out."

"Does that mean Aunt Hilda won't be turned into a cat?"

"Yes, dear," Zelda confirmed.

"Yes!" Hilda said. "I won't be sentenced to an eternity of cleaning my own butt!"

"I heard that," came Salem's indignant voice.

"Well, I guess that takes care of everything," Sabrina said happily. "Whoo-hoo!" She pushed away from the kitchen table. "I 'd better head back to the dorm." She started to point to herself.

"Not so fast, young lady," Zelda said sternly.

"What? What did I do?" Sabrina asked.

"You know perfectly well what I'm talking about," Zelda said, folding her arms. 

"She does?" Hilda asked. Zelda gave her a look. "Oh, right." She turned back to Sabrina. "Yes, we need to discuss your punishment for your cramming."

"Are you serious? After all that's just happened? I thought that lecture was bad enough!"

"I thought that the stress of Salem's disappearance was enough for that night, so I let you off easy with a talk," Zelda told her. "But, now that Salem's home and is taking responsibility for his actions..." She said the last part loud enough for Salem to hear.

"Yes, I'll never fake a kidnapping again by trashing the house," Salem shouted from the living room.

"It's time for you to take responsibility for yours," Zelda finished.

Sabrina groaned. Aunt Zelda was such a stickler for these kinds of things. Had she even been this bad at Sabrina's age? However many centuries ago that had been!

"First thing tomorrow, you and I are going to have a talk with your professor..."

As Sabrina listened to Zelda's plans for correcting her academic faux pas, she realized that things were back to normal. Salem was home safe and sound and she was getting one of her aunt's patented lectures. 

Yep, everything was back to the way it always was in the Spellman household. 

**_The End_**

  



End file.
